Ok so we all know about the Snow Whites, Cinderellas and various films of this (well, a version of this) world which seem designed to pull us down and tell us that we will never be perfect, nor will we ever get our fairytale ending. I mean what girl is nearly killed by her stepmother, then is rescued and falls in love with her prince? Not only that, the animals around her clean the house and cheer her up when she's down. The lowly housemaid, mentally abused by her extended family, one day finds a prince who accepts the reality of who she is and how she is.
Me? I knew straight off these things would never happen, not because it's an unrealistic view of the world, or that those princes are rare if not non-existent. What told me that I was never destined for the life Cinderella finally found was that Cinderella, Snow White and her ilk were always slim and beautiful. I wasn't slim and as far as I was concerned, neither was I beautiful.
No matter who I liked when I was younger I learned to lie about it. I never revealed who I truly fancied. I couldn't trust anyone to keep their mouth shut - someone would think it'd be clever to spread the 'news' and the poor lad would be ridiculed because the fatty liked him. I usually just went along with suggestions made by other girls as to who I might like.
But then in my middle teens, two weekends apart, two films came on the TV - both by coincidence starring Ricki Lake - Baby Cakes and Hairspray. Two films where the lead character was plump and happy being so. This to me was a new concept, but gave me for once in my life hope that someone might actually like me.
I always had issues, not only with my confidence, looks and size, but in that I genuinely hated myself. It wasn't until I was in my 20s that I found *me*, the person I truly was. Until that point I had been trying to be someone else, to fit in with others' expectations. I am now someone who still doesn't much like how she looks or how she dresses, but I am more settled in who I am, in what my personality is. I am now *me*!
But then again tonight while watching Netflix, I came across Sierra Burgess is a loser. The chubby girl who hates how she looks but knows who she is and tries to remain true to her caring nature, then falls for a guy who is, according to social convention and therefore her friends, out of her league. While the film itself is not too bad and is trying to send a positive message of acceptance and strength of character to impressionable teens, I need them to all know this: Your prince charming probably won't come in a package which fits the commonly accepted definition of "hot". But it doesn't matter - what matters is that you find a person who loves you for who you are, not what you look like. And you should do the same - find a partner who makes you laugh, smile, and thinks about you when you're not there.
Films are all well and good as stories and sometimes lessons in ideal morality, but unlike most films, in real life not all amazing things come in perfect packages.
